Wednesday, March 18, 2009

to woodstock times: draft


Regarding the recent spate of anti-israel letters in the paper: it's absurd to claim that all anti-Israel people are really Jew-haters.
Only 99% are.

I mean, if you think that Israel has a right to exist, you can understand why its government feels obliged to attack a place that has sent THOUSANDS of rockets into its civilian area. If there have been few deaths in Israel as a result of those rockets, it's because Israel has been careful to protect its citizens. And let's not forget that (a) Arab terrorists have exploded numerous bombs in Israel--in buses, pizza parlors, and (b) the inhabitants of Gaza voted for Hamas, a terrorist organization that wants to wipe Israel off the map. Was Israel's response disproportioate? It wasn't enough! Hamas is still firing rockets!

So, why are people like (names) such Jew haters?

1. As children, they learned that the Jews killed Jesus. Actually, Lennie Bruce, the social commentator, killed Jesus. "I was drunk at the time," he confessed. "I'm sorry and I won't do it again." Seriously, anti-Semitism is ingrained in people throughout the world--thanks to the they-killed-Jesus myth.

2. Jews tend to be guilty of financial crimes. An old study reached that conclusion. The same study found that Catholics tend to be guilty of crimes of violence and Protestants guilty of sex crimes. Personally, I prefer to be cheated by an occasional Jew to being mugged by a Catholic or sexually attacked by a Protestant.

3. Jew-haters like (names) are life's losers. They are successful neither in love nor in their careers nor in their friendships. They're lonely and bitter. And they have (they believe) so much talent! So, who's responsible? Those damn Jews! They're the ones who monopolize success! They win all those Nobel Prizes! Jon Stewart, (names), everywhere you look you find successful Jews! That's why I'm NOT successful! The Jews are keeping me lonely and miserable and unloved!

4. Of course, Jew-haters also tend to be dumb, shallow, full of rage, and ignorant -- which perhaps, just perhaps, helps account for their lowly station in life.

Warren Boroson

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